Israel Matzav

IDF develops flying pigs to destroy 'Palestinian' agriculture

Israel’s efforts to drive Palestinian farmers off their lands received a boost this week with the announcement that the army would partner with local pig breeders to develop flying pigs for release in Palestinian agricultural areas.

Palestinians have long accused Israel of releasing wild boars to wreak havoc with Palestinian farms. Palestinian President Mahmoud Abbas repeated the charge again several days ago, but as in the past, few international bodies have given the matter much attention. Until now the boar-release program has apparently been a private initiative, but to capitalize on the apparent apathy of the international community, the Israeli military entered into an arrangement with the country’s only pig-farming enterprise to launch a breeding program aimed at producing winged, flying swine capable of mobility and destruction that far outstrips the achievements of the current available animals.

Kibbutz Lahav’s swine program has sparked controversy since its inception, given the Jewish dietary ban on pork and the cultural aversion to the animal. However, the army, which officially maintains Jewish dietary laws in its facilities, nevertheless sought out the program heads to develop this new kind of bio-weapon, which could be deployed much more flexibly to destroy Palestinian farms and property without directly implicating Jewish settlers.

A spokesman for the IDF declined to divulge the details of the breeding program. “We’ll be intentionally harming Palestinian agriculture when pigs fly,” he said.

Labels: humor, IDF

posted by Carl in Jerusalem @ 11:57 AM