Israel Matzav

ICYMI: Hamas arrests Flipper

In case you missed this on Wednesday, Hamas has arrested Flipper and charged him with spying for Israel.

For real though: Army Radio reported that the dolphin was decked out with "spying equipment," including cameras, when it was captured by Hamas' naval unit. While The Times of Israel reports that the Israeli Navy has a fleet of "dolphin-class submarines," Hamas was definitely talking about an actual dolphin.

Israel is so often accused of animal espionage that an entire "Israel-related animal conspiracy theories" Wikipedia page exists. However, since dolphins are some of the smartest mammals on the planet, perhaps they are more likely to actually be spies than, say, the "trained sharks" that Israel allegedly used to target Egypt.

Anyone who knows whether we actually used a dolphin to spy on Hamas isn't saying. But think about this.

Heh.

Labels: Dolphin class submarines, Hamas, Israeli animal spy conspiracy theories, spying

'Mossad spy' eaten

In an earlier post, I reported that a swan had been caught 'spying for the Mossad' in Egypt. There was likely a translation problem from the Arabic original, because the swan was actually a stork, which is pictured above. The stork, which was named Menes, was eventually released to the wild, but has now been caught once again on an island in the middle of the Nile, and has met his demise. He's been eaten.

According to Nature Conservation Egypt, the White Stork, which they named Menes, was released into a conservation area in southern Egypt but flew to an island in the Nile where it was caught and eaten.

The group said on a Facebook post: "Storks have been part of the Nubian diet for thousands of years, so the actual act of eating storks is not in itself a unique practice. However, the short-lived success story of getting Menes released was not enough to keep him safe till he exited Egypt.

"Egypt has long suffered from issues of uncontrolled hunting. However, it is important to always balance the needs of local communities with the needs of nature and biodiversity conversation. We truly are saddened by the tragic end to Menes' journey, but once again, we would like to thank the park rangers of Aswan for their excellent initial efforts to get Menes the White Stork released safely into a protected area."

The capture of the stork was seen as an example of popular xenophobia and paranoia which has been used as a political tool by the former president, Hosni Mubarak, the deposed president Mohamad Morsi and the current army-backed regime.

Yes, we all remember the Zionist shark, don't we....

Labels: Egypt, Israeli animal spy conspiracy theories

Meet the Mossad's newest spy?

Yes, Egypt has detained a swan as a suspected spy.

Officials said a man brought the suspected winged infiltrator to a police station Friday in the Qena governorate, some 450 kilometers southeast of Cairo. According to the officials, the man suspected the bird was an undercover agent because it carried an electronic device.

The head of security in Qena said Saturday that officials examined the bird and the device. Mohammed Kamal said the device was neither an explosive nor a spying device. It was likely a wildlife tracker.

With turmoil gripping Egypt, authorities and citizens remain suspicious of anything foreign. Earlier this year, a security guard filed a police report after capturing a pigeon he said carried microfilm.

Those Jews are so clever.... Heh....

Labels: Israeli animal spy conspiracy theories, Mossad